I want to leave my job, my wife, my life behind. Throw my guitars in the van and take off.
What keeps me here? How is she going to live? Who will take her to the doctor?
Is it the duty-bound masochist in me that stays?
The coward that wants to keep the approval of ... neighbors and strangers? The "prestige" of having a marriage that lasted 33 years? I live a lie. Is the admiration of others for staying married so long really worth the stagnation and death of rotting away inside?

Life will soon be past

One reason for not getting divorced is so you can look down on people who are. It feels great!

Stay and make your marriage a happy one. Or leave, and find someone who brings those butterflies back.

Or be REALLY special. Stay and keep staying and keep staying MISERABLE until "death do us part". In a perverted way, I am proud to be this stupid!